Thursday 1 December 2011

How Can You Get out of Jail when you don't know you're In one?

I have been corresponding with a client who is working to find her place in life. That is made far harder because there is a long history of influence from a very dominant person. Such influences make thing very difficult. Here's what I said:

Hi Jayne,

If you are now well away from that dominant personality, then you can begin to explore.
You'll need to keep a very close eye on your thoughts, especially your preferences. They'll seem yours, but they'll be a legacy of that dominant personality.
Before I became a life coach, I spent decades thinking my father's opinions were my own. This surfaced in such bizarre things as being unable to watch kissing on TV and an urge to lob stones at cats. And far more, besides. 
Breaking out of that is tough enough, but when you don't realise there's anything to break out of - it's impossible. 
So try to question every thought you have which assigns a value to other things in the world. These judgements come so quickly and so "naturally" that they're very hard to spot.
I wish you well with it all.

Best Wishes,

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  1. Useful information. Fortunate me I found your web site by chance, and I’m surprised why this accident did not happened earlier! I bookmarked it.

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  3. Chris great post so many of us live our lives through others that we don't stop and ask ourselves, who do I really want to be and what do I really want out of life. When we realize our childhood has been a rehearsal for what others expect us to be and not our own we will be able to find the true happiness that we so earnestly desire.