Wednesday 10 September 2014

I don't need a life coach - I should be Self-Motivating - I Need a Kicking

Hello Janet,

I noticed your comment about feeling you should be self motivated and that you "need a good kick". Made me smile.

But you're too hard on yourself. You may feel you SHOULD be self-motivated, but the fact is that you're not. I feel I should be taller - but it isn't going to happen!

We often tend to "should" ourselves into misery. Things are what they are, and not always what we'd prefer. But that does NOT mean you're stuck with it.

Coaching is all about how to get from where you are given who you really are today - to where you want to be - without waving a magic wand to change your character, double your determination and give you super powers. Coaching at its best is for ordinary people who want to do less ordinary things.

Motivation is complex. If you're not motivated it means you're afraid of something which doing what you don't do might bring you - or else you're pessimistic that you could really have the outcome you want - or else you're not clear on what outcome you really want - or (more usually) some combination of all of them.

That is the bread-and-butter of life coaching. It's what I do with most clients, most of the time. Kicks are also available but cost extra - but seriously, I guess the weekly calls are a kind of kick - at least they're a motivation to do what you said you'd do because you'll be speaking to me. 

There are no punishments, but these calls re-connect you with your goals each week and find and remove the failure mechanisms. All this in a friendly, fun atmosphere.

No pressure - but I wanted to let you know that having no motivation is not the end point - it's a possible beginning.

Best Wishes,

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